Headline news: It is a wacky world By K. D. Seefeld News-Chronicle We are living during some wacky times. Turn on the cable news channel or pick up a newspaper and you never know what kind of crazy stuff you will hear or read. There is a marksman knocking off people in the D.C. suburbs, Bush II is talking preemptive war with Iraq, and airlines are going bust. Terrorist bombs are exploding all over the globe, while the New Jersey Supreme Court is illegally rewriting laws. Corrupt CEOs and politicians are sitting in the big house, while weird viruses, bacteria and diseases are inflicting people and animals. Thankfully, we don't live in an era of Prohibition. Talking heads, experts, psychobabblers and knuckleheads dominate the media. How does one decipher what's truly going on in this wacky world? Today, an online newspaper had two conflicting headlines. On one page was this headline: "Expert: Saddam, al-Qaida Intricately Linked." On the very next page was this headline: "France: Iraq Not Tied to al-Qaida." Perhaps it is time to dust off that old adage, "Don't believe anything you read and only half of what you see." With election day right around the corner, who could ignore these headlines: "Democratic Socialists of America sending people to Minnesota to illegally vote for Wellstone" and "South Dakota (voter) Fraud Probe Widens as Election Day Nears." Election and voter fraud is nothing new, but it makes one wonder, are the current lawmakers actually the ones who were elected, or are they and the laws they impose fraudulent? Sometimes, headlines are brazenly outlandish. In one of today's newspapers, this headline squealed, "Pregnant Pigs to get Constitutional Protection?" The story was about a ballot initiative in Florida to limit the "cruel and inhumane confinement of pigs during pregnancy." Go figure, people concerned about pregnant pigs but not unborn children. This looked like an interesting headline: "Teacher Accused of Selling Knife to Student." Probably some inner-city school where drugs and gangs are a problem? Not even close. A teacher in rural Texas who crafts and collects knives was approached by a student who also collects knives. The student wanted to buy one of the teacher's hunting knives to add to his collection. They agreed on a price and a place for the exchange. However, before the exchange took place, the teacher wanted authorization from the school principal that the transaction at school was appropriate. The principal had no objection. Additionally, the student's mother sent a permission letter with her kid to school authorizing the purchase. During lunch, the teacher and student closed the deal. This simple exchange caused a commotion at the Texas high school. The student was expelled. The teacher faces a third-degree felony indictment punishable by 10 years in prison and a $10,000 fine. The principal is on administrative leave. Ah! Zero tolerance, it overrides common sense every time. Sometimes things just don't work out as planned, but sometimes they do. Consider this headline: "48 Year Old Woman Gives Birth to Twins - Her Own Granddaughters." Sharon Dunn's daughter, Trish, found out at the age of 14, that she was born without a uterus. Upon learning this, Sharon told her daughter, "I will carry for you when the time comes, if the good Lord is willing." Years later, Trish married Mike Roberts. For several years, the couple attempted to adopt a child; unfortunately, adoption was not meant to be for this couple. Remembering her mom's offer to carry for her, Trish and Mike took Sharon up on her offer. Today, Trish, Mike and grandma Sharon are blessed with twins Kaitlyn and Shelby Roberts. Reading the story of the twins reminded me of an old song by Homer and Jethro. The song, "I'm My Own Grandpa," written in 1947, is about a guy, who through marriage, becomes his own grandpa. Yeah, it's a wacky world, but it has been that way for quite awhile.