Fasten your seatbelts, folks By Molly DeCleene News-Chronicle The Christmas shopping season is nigh upon us. That's right, readers. One day after you've awakened from your Thanksgiving-induced food coma, thousands of shoppers with lists in their hands and money in their pockets will hit malls and department stores in hopes of finding The Perfect Gift for their loved ones. I feel sick just thinking about it. Over the years, I have vowed to put an end to the holiday stress in my life by scaling back on preparations and focusing on the things that really matter to me: My family, my friends, and charity work. But, like some of you, my best intentions have been all but annihilated by Holiday Guilt. This year will be different. I refuse to capitulate to the over-commercialism that envelops an otherwise enjoyable holiday. I refuse to be trapped into thinking that material goods signify love and affection. I am taking a nontraditional approach to the gift-giving part of Christmas this year. Instead of cruising stores, looking for the aforementioned Perfect Gift, I am going to give immaterial things. If you, too, are tired of the pressures the holiday season brings, consider the following list of alternative gifts: * Swap favors. If your sister hates shoveling her driveway after a big snow, offer to do it for her. If she insists on paying you back, ask her to wash your car the following spring. You will both get a charge out of helping each other. * Offer to babysit. Do you know a couple who hasn't been out on a real date in months? Call them up and tell them you'll watch their child or children while they dine out, catch a movie or enjoy some other grownup activity. They'll thank you more than once. * Make a donation in someone's name. True, this gift involves money; but that money will go to a good cause. Is your best friend an avid supporter of the Humane Society? Write a check to the organization, or donate some pet toys or pet food. Does your aunt sing in her church choir? Pitch in a few bucks for new choir robes. You'll feel good knowing you helped a great organization. * Send flowers. To make this gift even greater, don't send them on Christmas Day. Try sending them several weeks before the holiday, when the recipient is going crazy with Christmas preparations. He or she will love this pick-me-up, this nontraditional gift. * Send a thank-you note. No matter how selfless people are, they still like to be acknowledged for acts of kindness. Instead of sending a gift to a family member or a friend, buy or make a pretty card and write a short note thanking him or her for the friendship, support, trust, kindness and other things he or she has bestowed upon you. The recipient will be truly touched. * Deliver a home-cooked meal. I plan on doing this for my grandmother (if you're reading this, Grandma, I'm sorry I ruined the surprise!), partly because I love to cook and partly because we'll have lots of time to visit while our food is heating. Delivering a meal can be especially sweet if your destination is a homeless shelter. * Wrap a batch of holiday cookies. Yeah, yeah, everyone's trying to watch their weight during the holidays. But who says the recipient of your gift has to eat the cookies him- or herself? Pack your best Christmas bakery in a tin, wrap it in pretty ribbon and top it off with a bow. If you'd like, give hot chocolate mix or milk with the cookies. * Give your spouse a break. If it's your wife's duty to take out the garbage, offer to do it for her. If your husband is stuck on dish detail, give him a night off and give yourself dishpan hands (or bribe one of your children to do the chore). Who wouldn't want a respite from the daily grind? * Frame it. This, too, involves spending money, but not much. Buy an inexpensive photo frame or, if you are feeling artsy, decorate a plain paper or wooden one. Insert a photo of your family, your pet, the hot barista at the local coffee shop. Then wrap it and give it to that special someone. * Take a mini-break. You don't have to travel to do it, either. Just turn off the ringer on your telephone (your answering machine can take the calls) and ignore the doorbell. Then, do something you enjoy. Read a book, allow yourself to watch a half-hour of mindless television, nap, eat ice cream right out of the container, et cetera. You will feel revived. Well, folks, there it is. A short list of nontraditional Christmas gifts. If you have ideas of your own that you would like to see in print, please send them to me at [email protected]. I will run them in a future column. Thanks for reading! If you have comments or an idea for this space, please contact DeCleeneher at [email protected].